Thank you 320Sycamore

I'm Obsessed.....

Obsessed.....With doing this in Katie Ruth's room, over her bed.  O.B.S.E.S.S.E.D.

Some Quick Updates

1.  Our court dossier has been sent to Katie's country!  What does this mean?  It means that we should get a faster court date once we've made our first trip.  Having the documents already there should mean less time between our first and second trips.  And less time until we get this monkey home.

2.  We got word today that our registration dossier should be filed next week!!!  That means it is very likely that we could travel in the next 6-8 weeks.  As we all know, things can never be predicted in this adventure.  However, it is very promising that we could be looking at travel time and referring to it in weeks instead of months.  I can't wait to get my hands on these cheeks.

3.  Jack turned four yesterday.  

He asked me if Katie Ruth could come to his party.  Sweet love.  When I told him that she couldn't, he asked if he could save her some cake.  Um, gross.  He asked if he could call her to tell her it was his birthday.  He is just dying to get her home.  He told me, "When you bring Katie Roof home, do you know the first thing I'll say to her?  Thank you for coming here.  Do you know why?  Because I CAN TELL HER WHAT TO DO!"  Clearly someone has been bossed around for, oh his entire life.  I so hope Katie is home for her birthday. . . don't worry.  I've already got about 32 birthday parties planned for her.  

4.  I think this weekend I'll start making some freezer meals for while we're gone, make some notes about the boys' meds, school, activities, and things like that so when we get a travel date I don't have to worry about that.  It's exciting to think we may actually go soon!

Katie's Room

We have made a LOT of changes to our guest room since we moved into our house last year.  

This was the room when we walked through the house before buying.

It has the largest closet in the house, which was very poorly utilized.

It has a non-functioning fireplace, which is OK with me.

(It's non-functioning because there was previously a fire in our house, which originated in this fireplace.  It is the only fireplace in our house that has not been converted to gas, and after the fire the chimney in our house was dismantled.)

It had builder color cream paint.

It also has amazing hardwood floors, a fabulous transom window, and a huge window seat.

We were going to make this our master bedroom. 

Until we realized there was no way our bed would fit up the stairs.

We bought a great bedroom set from a family friend.  We got a full size bed, hope chest, dresser, vanity, and two side tables.  For $50.  Yes, I'm serious.  It fits perfectly in the room, and the style matches the rest of our furniture.  I'm not a real modern furniture girl - I like very traditional things.  So this is how we had it once we painted the room.  We used Martha Stewart's sea glass paint from Home Depot.  I tried about 10 different colors before I found the one we used, and it's exactly what I wanted.  

This is what you see when you walk in the door now.

I got a fabulous bedding set at Essex.  It's so soft, and it was $22.99 for the spread and two shams.  It had a Macy's tag on it for $329.99.  For real.  Essex is pretty ghetto, but it's worth digging around to find deals like that.

I made the two pillows that are on the bed.  I'm going to make some more to add, and will likely monogram the shams once she's home.  Right now the plan is for her to sleep in this bed.  We may start with a toddler bed for her, but this will eventually be where she sleeps.  

This is the bookcase that I redid - it was a simple project with just a few coats of paint and some scrapbook paper on the backs of each shelf.  The basket and bucket were a couple of projects for me, and I painted the frame on the top shelf and the K.  The elephant and doll on the top shelf were Christmas gifts for Katie, as was the polar bear.

My mom made the curtains.  They are perfect, and I L.O.V.E. them.  The fabric is from Joann's, and I was unsure about it when I first brought it home.  I had a piece taped on the wall for a long time before I decided to do it.  I love it.  It is much more bold than I usually would choose, but it's exactly what I was hoping it would be.  The tiebacks are just a wide navy grosgrain ribbon held back with a small hook.  

The lamp on the vanity is my next project, and I have something in mind already.  It's a lamp that I had in David and Henry's old room, and while the colors aren't what I want to use anymore, the lamp is perfect for the space.  I've already started to re-do it and will show you when it's done.  The chair at the vanity was a chair from my office that was going to be thrown away.  I recovered it and made a small pillow for the back.

See that basket of hair bows?  It was donated to our silent auction for the Coins for Katie Pancake breakfast.  Someone paid $45 for it.  And gave it to me for Katie.  

Let's just say I hope the child will keep a bow or headband in her hair...

I made the art over the fireplace, and am now searching for something else to put on the mantle.  I have some ideas, but nothing that I've started yet.

The dollhouse was a gift from my friend Brandi, and Jack loves it.  Like, pink puffy heart loves it.  He has moved Batman, Robin, and Mr. Incredible right in, and they've quickly taken over the childcare duties.  He's also backed his batman van and a lego van right up so they've got some transportation.

I moved this chair in from the playroom.  Mostly because it was constantly getting turned over and used as a launchpad for a small boy when it was in the playroom.  I like it in this room, and Jack and I have broken it in here in its new space and have read many books and snuggled here.

I still have to decide if I will make cushions for the window seat I didn't show you, and what to do about a rug.  I'm thinking I want an area rug, maybe in sea grass or something similar.  Overall, I'm quite happy with how the room has developed so far!

Crafty Business

Since we have no dossier to be working on or suitcases to be packing, I've been keeping myself busy with some craft projects.  I usually have about 6 or 7 different ones going at any point, so I've really tried to finish some up before I start new ones.  We'll see how long that lasts. . .

As you may have noticed, I'm quite *ahem* thrifty.  I pretty much refuse to pay full price for something.  This is rooted in several things.  We are a single income family with three children, so I can't just run out and buy something every time I feel like it - I have to be more intentional about my purchases.  And trust me when I say this did not come naturally to me.  My thriftiness started out of necessity.  Now, it's almost a game for me.  If I see something for our home that I like at, for example, Pottery Barn or Ballard Designs, I will try to duplicate it instead of buying it.  Most of the time, I'm very satisfied with my version.  Which I promise cost significantly less than the original item.  So the first thing I recently finished was some storage for Katie's room.

I started with this.  For real.

It was 99 cents on half price day at Goodwill.

Now seriously, buying that and knowing I could make it look good is some real vision.  Or crazy business, because this was some airbrushing at its finest.

This cute pink bucket is what it looks like now.

I sanded the heck out of it, use a spray primer, and spray painted it with some leftover pink I had.  Total project cost?  99 cents.

This was my next project.  It was also a half price GW find.  It had some chickens and eggs hot glued to the front.  Cute, right?  I yanked those suckers off.  It was $1.99, so I really wasn't going to be too heartbroken if I ruined it by pulling off the crazy chickens.  Next, I used some leftover sample paint I had from when I couldn't decide what color to paint Katie's room, so that part of the project was free.  I used a foam brush and painted a few coats over the brick red.  Now it's a perfect storage basket on her bookshelf, and it cost $1.99 and about an hour of my time.  I'm going to find a small K and glue it to the front.  By that point the project will probably be about $5.00.

I love the framed saying on the top of her bookshelf - it says "There's no place like home."  I think I'm going to paint that bookend tangerine, which would match her curtains and some pillows I've already made.  That bookend is part of a set that I got as a gift about 7 years ago.  I already have the paint, so that project will be a freebie.

Do you remember in my post about her Christmas stocking I showed you an etsy print that I wanted to try to make?

It looks like this.  

I liked that version, but I didn't love it.  

And I certainly didn't love it for $75.00 plus shipping.

So I got a canvas for $5.00 (two for $10.00 - Henry got one of them for Christmas) and got started.  I painted the canvas tangerine, my current color obsession.  ($2.49 for the craft paint.)  I bought some scrapbook paper at Hobby Lobby when they were 50% off, and I just picked random patterns that I liked together, some skin tones, and some colors for hair.  I ended up spending $6.00 on the paper and got WAY more than I needed.  I probably used $2.00 worth of the paper I got, and I will use some of the other pieces for mats for some frames in her room or elsewhere in the house.  (So my total cost for this project was about $10.00.  Not $75 plus shipping!)  The prints on the papers I got match other rooms in our home as well.  

I used the same template from the Christmas stocking and just eyeballed it to make it bigger for the largest doll.  I used the largest one to make them incrementally smaller and just eyeballed it again each time.  For the faces, I just found things that were round and were the size I wanted the faces to be, traced them, and used that as a guide.

And I L.O.V.E. it.  Henry is working on something that will go on either side of it, and I can't wait to show you that.  And yes, I realize the mantle needs something else other than a Tyler candle (my favorite!), some bare wood people begging to be painted, and a candy cane pen.  Baby steps.  That mantle's been empty for a year and a half!

They still need some faces, but I had maxed out my *artistic* abilities for the day.  And really, I'm a little scared that my lack of creativity will ruin this when I put their faces on....I promise they'll be faceless for a while!

No News Is Good News

Well this blog has turned quite boring since there's not any news ...... I did hear from our coordinator that our dossier is with the translators now.  Most of Katie's country is closed until after January 10th for a big Christmas celebration, so hopefully once things reopen we'll hear something.  Until then, we wait!

To Quote the Wise Tom Petty....

The waiting is the hardest part.

You take it on faith.

You take it to heart.

The waiting is the hardest part.

Up to this point, we have lots to do for our adoption.  You hear a lot about the paper chasing.  The fundraising.  The applications that have to be filled out.  The medical exams to have performed.  The tax information to collect.  The fundraising.  The notarizing that needs to be done.  The background checks and the fingerprinting.  The USCIS clearance to obtain.  The fundraising.  The photographs to assemble.  The apostilling to be done.  The fundraising.  We've done all of it for the last seven months.  And I think we've done it pretty well.  Now?  Now we wait.  And Tom Petty was right.  (Or in this video, Eddie Vedder and Tom Petty......what?  The 90s were some of my best years.)  The waiting is the hardest part.  

When I was busy compiling all of that information and scheduling all of the appointments, I didn't have time to worry.  Time to worry about E.V.E.R.Y.T.H.I.N.G.  I'm not a worrier by nature - not at all.  I'm the person who takes care of things so someone else doesn't have to worry about it.  I'm a fixer.  I spend the vast majority of my day telling people not to worry - not to worry about their divorce, their cheating spouse, the children being passed back and forth between two bickering parents, their child support that isn't being paid or their child support that they can't afford anymore, their pending criminal charges or their violation of probation, their trial that they have next week, or how to explain to their spouse that they want a divorce.  I cannot tell you how many times a day I tell someone, "Don't worry about it right now.  I will take care of it."  And I do take care of it.  And then I come home from work and tell people not to worry - not to worry about the dog peeing on the floor, not to worry about dinner needing to be cooked.  Not to worry about the laundry that needs to be taken care of, or the dishwasher that needs to be unloaded.  Not to worry about the bikes that need to be put away or the Legos that need to be cleaned up.  Don't worry about your brother crying - he's just tired.  Don't worry about your milk spilling - we can clean it up.  Don't worry about the leaky roof.  I'll call someone to fix it.  And please don't think that my husband sits around eating ice cream and watching television all day - he does not.  All of the day to day things that I have listed at home are just part of having a family and having things to do all of the time.  There is always something that needs to be taken care of.  Always.  And I like being the reliable person or the person people know they can count on.

But now, with no paper chasing to do, not forms to fill out, no plans to make, I have time to worry.  And that's pretty much all I'm doing.  I alternate between being worried that we won't be approved to adopt her to being worried that we're not the right parents for her.  I worry about her being in her orphanage still, and how hard that must be for her.  I worry about her health and about the medical care she is missing out on right now while we wait.  I worry about her "non-accute" heart condition.  I worry about her cognitive development and how every day that passes is another missed day for therapies and attention and stimulation and love that she's not getting.  I worry about how that will affect her.  I worry about all of the medical information we do not have, but I know is probably there.  I worry that she's going to start getting therapies when she's at least five, instead of when she was a baby.  I worry about whether she's warm enough or if her belly is full enough.  I worry about her banging her head against a wall or rocking back and forth or pulling her hair out to try to soothe herself, because she doesn't have someone to do that for her.  I worry when Jack comes downstairs after he had a bad dream and I snuggle him up in a cuddly blanket and rock him back to sleep while I quietly hum "You are My Sunshine" to his hot sweaty baby self, because I know when she wakes up with a bad dream she has nobody.  I worry about when we will travel.  I worry about my children while we will be gone.  I worry about David, who snuggled me close at bedtime last week and said, "I won't be able to take it while you are visiting Katie.  You've never been away from me for that long and I will be so sad."  And I worry because I know that's true.  I worry about Henry being upset while we're gone but not talking to anyone about it and being sad.  I worry about when we bring Katie home, and I worry that we won't bring her home.  I worry about court in her country, and how scary that will be for us.  I worry that my husband, who is so much less comfortable talking to people than me, will have to do the talking for us in court.  I worry because I know he will be nervous.  I worry that there won't be hot water in our hotel and I'll be so irritated the whole time.  I worry about what my husband will eat in her country because he is a fairly selective eater.  I worry that we're making a big mistake and that our family will be forever changed by this experience, no matter the outcome, and what if I want to go back to how we were before?  I worry that she will hate us.  I worry that she will not bond with us and will be miserable here.  I worry about her parents, and whether they will come back for her when they learn that new parents want to take her home.  I worry that her parents didn't give her up because they wanted to, but because they felt like they didn't have a choice.  I worry that I won't be enough for her - patient enough, smart enough, loving enough, strong enough, kind enough, understanding enough, warm enough, or enough of a mama to make up for five years without one.  I worry that she'll hate our dogs or our food or her new clothes or her sheets or the color of the walls in her room or the shampoo we use or the way our house smells........you can see how ridiculous some of these fears and worries are.  

Clearly my still hands have given way to a wildly active mind.  I wake up in the middle of the night worrying about these things, convincing myself in the dark quiet middle of the night that these worries are bigger than bringing her home.  And while I know rationally that this is not the case, I can convince myself of anything in the middle of the night.  And I am not a pessimistic person - really I'm not.  I am usually able to look at the situation and work my way through it.  That's the problem.  There is no situation right now.  There's no to-do list to work on.  No checklist to check.  Nothing.  Nothing but waiting.  I know our family is forever changed by this experience, no matter the outcome.  And I know that we are all better for it.  I know that we will have challenges with Katie:  challenges with her eating, and her self-soothing, challenges with her behavior and her communication, challenges with her therapies and her adjustment, challenges wither her diagnoses and the best way to handle them, challenges with her being sad and with teaching her how to be part of a family.  Nothing about this process is easy, and we don't expect it to be.  Really?  If I'm being honest, we expect bringing her home to be hard as hell.  Sort of like being a parent has been so far.  

So until something changes, we wait.  Our dossier is with the translators and they are back from their holiday January 10th.  And we'll keep waiting.  And hopefully I'll stop worrying so much!